So much time has passed. I have these moments where I think to myself where are you, who are you, what day is it today? Time is lost on me. It always has been. To me, the most sensible thing about time is that the clock is a perfect circle. I keep coming back here; back to this place, but on a different day and with a different set of eyes. I read an old journal this morning. Nearly by accident, but not exactly. It had been lying there in my closet waiting for a home after a recent unpacking. Before I retired it to the drawer where I retire things, I gave it one last look. A page from another life. Same person, different day, different set of eyes, lighter pressure on the pen. A page full of certainty and also full of questions. It's always strange to read the things you've hoped for in the past because by now those hopes may be spoken for or gone, transformed or altogether forgotten. Like time, hope can be so senseless. It can carry us up mountains or lie us in the quicksand. But like time, hope is unstoppable, inevitable, and blind. Sometimes we travel fast, hurdling towards the unknown, sometimes the unknown comes hurdling towards us while we watch time standing still. All of this means very little I'm sure, but it felt like something when I sat down to write it.

Perhaps I've been wasting our time.

Current Mood: contemplative

These Kids are way too cool for me, now. It’s like everyone else gets this newsletter with all of the good stuff in it: what to wear, what to hear, how to speak and what to speak out against… The public opinion moves like a pack of animals, each frightened soul pushing it’s way towards the middle of the herd for fear of the wolves or the wind outside.

Well, I’ll tell you Kids… We wolves have better ways to fill our bellies, and the wind doesn’t care about you, either. Your scenes will take you all the way home. Your scene will keep you safe-- you’ll never think a thought of your own, and you’ll never know what you could have known, where you could have gone, or whether you were right or wrong… But your soul, Kids. Your soul can’t flat iron it’s hair.

Current Location: sitting at my desk, aimlessly doing nothing on my laptop
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: R Kelly - I'm a Flirt (Seth is playing it on his laptop)

this just in:

i love life!

yay!

anyone wanna join me?!

Current Mood: relaxed

ah this was a fun weekend
went to katie's house yesterday after going to the mall and doin a little shopping, i had to get a suit for my cousin's wedding in about a month and a half
we went to olive garden for dinner and now its basically my favorite restaurant ever =p it was soo good
then we went to wegman's, got some candy, and went to her high school's play
they did grease, i thought it was pretty good for high school kids, but apparently they're usually better, oh well, i enjoyed it


on a different note, i got into Syracuse =)
however, i got waitlisted from RPI =( =( =(
i guess its not completely over yet tho, i still have a chance to get in
but one question:
does anyone know how long it takes for schools to tell the waitlisted ppl whether they're in or out?
cuz there are deadlines to tell other schools whether or not i'm goin there and RPI is still my top choice so i dont wanna count it out yet...

Current Mood: tired

Procrastination

Yesterday, I said I would
Until the time had passed,
And now today, I see my list
Of never-ending tasks.

Why so, I ask myself, did I
Put off that task at hand?
For yesterday has added to
My ever-growing plans,

Of things I say I will attend,
Accomplish or provide;
Seems every day I put if off -
It multiplies in size.

A simple job if given
My devotion for a time;
Would surely have resolved itself
And eased my worried mind.

However, due to circumstance,
As always is the case;
I had no time to spend that day …
I had no time to waste.

For yesterday, I worked on
All the tasks I had delayed,
From days before when I would say
I have no time today.

You see, tomorrow’s easier
To say that I will vow,
To catch up on the overload,
And yet - I wonder how?

‘Tis easier to play the part
Of victim in this case,
And be the martyr ever-more
I have no time to waste.

Current Mood: relaxed

A Perfect Moment

Beautiful eyes open across a pillow top,
It seems for this moment time will stop,
The earth slows and sounds wane,
A frozen moment without stain.

Your body close to mine,
Our hearts beat in time,
With a smile of simple pleasure,
This moment should last forever.

Some say perfection is unattainable
For most things that's explainable,
But in your arms and with your heart's affection
I have found a brief moment of perfection.

Current Mood: gloomy

hmmm well break was alright
i went to old forge from wednesday to sunday
there were drunk adults every night, kinda funny, kinda scary
i became a master of card games - gin rummy, crazy eights, pitch, and euchure
we went snowmobiling and skiing and watched the northeastern dogsled championship race =)
we had 3 quizzes, a short answer test, and other test corrections for physics to do over break, i only got the short answer test done, which i was up til 3 am sunday night (well, monday morning) in order to get it done
ugh, so much physics, basically my life from after school til bed is physics and only physics, so wackkkk
i miss katie =( i haven't seen her in over a week =(

i got a jack johnson guitar book =) i'm pretty pumped about it, too bad i haven't been able to practice any of it

fucking physics.

Current Mood: tired
Current Music: dreams be dreams - jack johnson

i got accepted to Clarkson =)

but no scholarship =(

... well, yet

Current Mood: happy

well all in all it was a pretty eventful weekend i'd say

friday was the hockey game at CA - tons of fun and craziness, especially considering our fans were louder than theres and they had more ppl and they were the home team...thats kinda sweet. i'm pretty excited for the home sectional game, hopefully they'll do well enough to get another shot at CA, i hate those douchebags damnit

saturday i went to katie's for the day/night. we went to their senior night hockey game at 3 (against CA, what are the chances?) and they actually almost won but came up a goal short, oh so sadly.

then we grabbed a bite to eat and went to the rochester knighthawks game (pro lacrosse). this is where the fun REALLY got started.

so about 10 min into the game, this kid who was with was told katie to move her bag bcuz someone was puking behind us, so we figured it was a couple rows back ya kno? but then i turn around only to see this girl just puking a streamline right on to katie's coat and part of her back and eventually onto the floor. yeah. i was pissed and started flippin out on this girl, katie was in shock, and this girl simply got up, looked at us, and walked away. she didnt say a goddamn word, no sorry. nothing. meanwhile thru this all, i'm startin to gag cuz i cant stand the smell or look of puke, so we had to leave immediately, katie washed her coat and shirt off the best she could, some generous lady helped her out with it, and managed to make it smell like something other than puke, so we did stay and finish watching the game (in a different section) and hey, they scored 9 goals in the 4th quarter to win 11-4, not too shabby...

its hard for me to understand why someone wouldn't even say sorry or anything tho, thats what bothered me the most about it. we told this puerto rican guy about it later in the game, and he said he would've even given us money for katie's shirt, and this girl can even say sorry?

its baffling.

in better news, i got accepted to UB and a $12,000 scholarship for 4 years (3k each year), so thats always good

i hate playing the waiting game for colleges...

Current Mood: tired
Current Music: squeaks of my chair

stolen from ronna and laura:


Open iTunes, Musicmatch, Winamp or Windows Media Player to answer the following. Go to your library. Answer, no matter how embarrassing it is...

Sort by song
First song: Accidentally in Love - Counting Crows
Last song:

Sort by time
Shortest song: Jeff Wears Birkenstocks - NOFX
Longest song: Trapped in the Closet - R. Kelly

Sort by Artist
First Artist: The Academy Is...
Last Artist: 50 Cent

Sort by album
First Album: The Album - Ronnie Day
Last Album: Zombies! Aliens! Vampires! Dinosaurs! - Hellogoodbye

Sort by Most played
What song: Okay I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don't - Brand New
How Many plays: 59

Search the key word and see how many songs appear
"Sex": [5]
"Death": [14]
"Love": [34]
"You": [124]
"Me": [163]
''Drugs'': [0]
''Hate'': [4]
Search for your own name, how many?: [0]

Do The Shuffle!
Shuffle your library and list the first ten songs. Be honest!
1) honest mistake - the bravery
2) running out of days - 3 doors down
3) all along the watchtower - jimi hendrix
4) breaking the habit - linkin park
5) half moon bay- ronnie day
6) so damn lucky - dmb
7) night on fire - vhs or beta
8) that was a crazy game of poker - OAR
9) helicopter - bloc party
10) your call - secondhand serenade


wooohooo

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: So Damn Lucky (Live at Radio City) - DMB